Was super moody today after wht happen yesterday. It was really a sudden attack man! Cant sleep till 4 plus. Keep thinking bout those beautiful memories we had, and those words you told me, and how you tell me you liked me, and everything. Cried alot, even me myself was shocked. I prayed and prayed and prayed, and lucky he is thr to comfort me, and i fall asleep finally.. Really felt i am a failure and a fool. I have been to your blog countless times, looking at your profile, looking at your post. But i didnt notice tht you are ________. So fool. Until the recent post, everything was reviewed. I had nvr ever thought of tht, i thought you will wait, and i thought we have a chance. Oh, well. Everything has shown. Regretted my acts alot, but i couldn't do anything. Lucky i didnt tell you wht i was thinking. If not, it will be so embarrass. Lucky me (:
Woke up at around 10 plus, and my whole eyes is swollen and red. Lucky my parents and brothers not at home.. Watch videos, cried abit cause the story line got abit same as mine. Then after tht bath, go out for CMG.
I was super moody. Sorry YiZhen, for my cold-ness. She keep ask me wht happen, but i said nothing and force a smile to her. Really sorry.
Today God's word really touch me, and i found myself not a failure, no more a failure. Everyone is NOT a failure. I cried as i was worshiping, i will really thinking about you, but i tell myself to put everything aside and i did :D So proud of myself.(*Clap Clap*) I was so hype-up when cgm was over :D Nothing about you came back. Even if thr is, i am not sad. I want to thank you for giving me such a big attack. After this, i found out tht thr's more important things in my life. Devoted to God.
But also, i hope wht i see isn't real. After all, i want you back. But we are still friends :D I will always still be thr for you no matter wht. I will still consider waiting for you :D



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T.YANLING
24November1995
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